This will be a rare occurrence on this blog: a short post. If you know me, you know that this only happens once in every thousand years on average. Truly!
I have had a few busy weeks… Oh who am I kidding? I have been running like crazy since I left in December. Most days are a blur, and it is a strange feeling even still being out of the house so much, especially since I spent four years caged up like an animal. It seems when I got my life back, I got it back with a vengeance. I have not taken much time to step back and look at it, but I was thinking about it on the way home, since we had a thirty minute car ride and we were all pretty much tired out.
Some people have said I should slow down, but I am 36 years young, free of my previous misery, and grateful. I find myself being grateful for the smallest things, and I am sure I drive people crazy, because I can never say thank you once and have it be enough. The girls apologize for “dragging” me out without asking. But unless you have been through the kind of broke I went through the past several years, you have no idea how excited I am to still find money in my wallet, be able to pull out my card and pay for lunch for the girls, or go shopping to buy something because I want it.
To be able to walk out the door and not have to worry about stalker calls. To be able to laugh and have fun and be honestly enjoying it instead of obsessing over the time.
Today was a simple but busy day. After wanting to gouge out my eyes from the joys of invoicing, I had my Bible study and dinner, and then I was taken away to run to the mall before it closed. And I got my brows threaded. No big deal to you, but it meant everything in terms of moving on with my life. I didn’t have to worry about trouble at home for doing it or going without him. I didn’t have to worry about being accused of anything. AND I had money to do it.
And my “sister” paid! What?!?! And I found myself choking on my words I always tell people when I do the very same to them: just appreciate someone caring enough to do it and say thank you. LOL I knew that day would come.
We got in the car and drove home into the night. As the fog and mist swirled in the fields, I felt the last of his grip fall away somewhere in the darkness, and I sighed.
So now I find myself overwhelmed with love and appreciation, and I have to profusely thank Jehovah, my newly adopted family (that everyone thinks is my real family anyway lol), my congregation, and definitely not last, my Kerwyn. 😉 Anyone else who has been there in any way, shape, or form, I love you, all, too.
I finally made it through.