When I first came here at the end of February and started my blog, I felt completely alone. Despite the fact that logically, in my head, I knew there was a mass of women and men who have gone through situations similar to mine, I was still so entwined in the isolation I was dragged into that the simple knowledge of that never made to my heart. My first posts are rather raw, the freshness of the pain evident. To this day, there are some things I cannot go back and read, for some bruises, no matter how the time passes, never seem to heal. I still have my occasional struggles with two particularly traumatic events, inability to learn to forgive myself or develop patience, compassion, or kindness for myself, fear of vulnerability, and the nagging hole in my memory.
In the midst of this, one of the first bloggers I met here was Jessica. She is several years younger than I, but she is also a veteran of familial violence and has had to overcome so much in her life. I wish dearly that this was something we did not share, because it pains me to know how much others suffer an endure in their lifetime, but it was ultimately this connection I needed to help me make a lot of progress early on when it is most crucial.
We both grew up in dysfunctional, abusive homes where violence of varying degrees was present. However, what Jessica endure growing up was so painful for her, she took matters into her own hands and left. It was safer for her to be crashing with different friends while she made her way through school and graduated than it was to be in her mother’s home where she was subject to one particular “punishment” that was barbaric.
From enduring and escaping abuse as a young woman, to graduating despite everything. From attempts at reconciling damaged relationships with her family, losing someone so central in her life, again enduring and finally escaping abuse at the hands of her ex, and the myriad of doubts and pain and fear she has had to overcome… She has lifted herself up out of the lowest abyss, graduated from UCLA, and become the model of love, compassion, and respect that she did not have during the most impressionable years of her life. Jessica reaches her hand out to so many who have / are suffering and helps them up and find peace and happiness in their lives… for them have a place to stay, food to eat, help in transitioning from domestic violence, and more.
Jessica is overflowing with strength, resilience, compassion, kindness, love, and mercy, despite being so severely violated by those who should have protected her and cherished her. Instead of hoarding this joy away from all the world, she gives of it freely (more so than she would give herself credit for) so all of us who have been where she was can be encouraged and uplifted and go on to be the better version of ourselves that is just waiting to be claimed. She inspires and incites others to do the same.
Please stop by her blog (click her photo above to link to her blog) and share her little corner of the world, this dear young lady that I feel honored to consider my sister and friend.