6 comments on “Breaking Through: Overcoming the Fear of Loss and Abandonment

  1. Hi, I’m the newbie. Just wanted to tell you that I identify with so many of your thoughts and struggle with the exact same issues. You express yourself beautifully.

    • Hi, there, and welcome to my little corner of the blogging world. In some ways, I wish you couldn’t identify with so much, because it means you’ve been there. The thought of another human being subjected to this hurts my heart. The good thing is we find each other and connect so we don’t feel so alone or like no one understands. Blogging has been very therapeutic for me, and as you may have guessed, I “might” like to write. LOL Welcome again, I look forward to getting to know you 🙂

  2. You’ve come so far. You really have. *hugs* A lot of things linger on, but I hope that with each passing day, things continue to ease, and you experience more lightness in your heart, and more joy.

    • Hi Rei-chan 🙂 Most of the time I can see how much progress I have made. The beginning was horribly rough, and Kerwyn has been there since almost day one. The days my neurosis gets out of check, he has his hands full, and it’s really not fair to him just because I’m traumatized. I don’t want to end up pushing him away because I can’t get this worked out. Human beings can only handle so much. It doesn’t matter how wonderful he is, I am quite sure he has his limits. But he has helped me come a long way; I adore him so. 🙂 Every day the bad shrinks further back and only good comes in to fill the spaces. So I guess I can’t be doing *so* bad!

  3. This is beautiful…eloquently written.

    I think we all become hypersensitive after being in an abusive relationship. And it takes a long time to build our self-esteem back up and not “turn on ourselves”. I am still in the process, but I have gotten benefit from guided meditations. I believe I am growing spiritually, and I no longer attach myself to outcomes. I try to live in the Now and enjoy whatever’s happening in the moment.

    You will get through this. On a side note, I am very impressed with your blog and your writing 🙂

    • Everyone keeps saying these things about my writing, but it’s just that I really feel most comfortable when I write. I have this odd ability to be very deliberate with my words, and sometimes things sound more powerful or tangible than I meant them to be. Not that I try to cover things up, but I try to put as positive a spin on something so ugly (as best as I can), because I think everyone coming here has endured enough negative bombardment of hateful words. I try to encourage as much as possible. But thank you for the compliment 🙂

      So many things are a struggle after we leave, but the worst by far is the damage left by the verbal and emotional abuse. It seems like just when you start to get past something and you think you have it subdued, it roars back out like a lion, and it is so frustrating. I am not very talented at turning myself. I had the “best” worst teacher for that, and I find it absolutely detestable. It’s so strange how we have so much compassion for everyone else but sometimes not a lick of it for ourselves.

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